People are in relationship with this world, with people, places, things and even concepts like beliefs, values and personal perceptions. When I help someone process, I first have them identify a problem in their life, money for example. We examine their relationship with money, from start to present (family history, first jobs, etc.) and then we look at the beliefs and values that they have placed on money and things throughout time. Then, it is time to reevaluate their relationship they have with money. What are some old beliefs that they know now are not true? Money can’t buy you love, things don’t replace people or if they do loneliness results. What emerges is a “new relationship” with money based on current values and judgments instead of old, outdated, or maybe even immature values. You may take these steps with any issue or any area of concern.
1) Identify area of concern
2) Examine the relationship you have with it starting from when you first became aware that it was a priority
3) What are the beliefs or values you have of it throughout time until now
4) What “old beliefs” can be set aside, and what new beliefs can you create in their place
5) Self-reflect on this process and ask yourself “What other things have I learned about myself by looking at this relationship with this person, place or thing and how can I use this tool in other areas of my life?”